Archive for the ‘My son’ Category

There is a fallacy that a man can be greater than his father.

This thot seems to be more pronounced among Africans who have learned and perfected new ways that their fathers knew nothing of. It goes something like this. That if a man gets more learning than his father did or he gets to run a business empire his father would not have imagined possible, or he gets the greatest honors bestowed to him by his fellow mortals based on his work, talents, etc, then yes, he can rise and be greater than his father. Surely everyone knows Bill Gates, and all his achievementss and wealth and charity. How many people know his father? When we want to refer to Gates Senior, we talk of Bill Gate’s father, as if senior gets his identity from his son. You can think of other examples. You are perhaps more accomplished than your father could have ever dreamed of. More accomplished, yes. Greater. No no.

Lets do a thought experiment. Lets suppose for a moment that there was a fierce greateness contest. Lets say you are exactly 39 years of age, and that senior is 82 years. Let us time travel to -39 and 10 months ago. Senior decides, no Junior. End of contest. You lose. You can never be greater than your father.

OK. Perhaps your father did stuff you would not like to be associated with, things you would like to escape. Things you hate, things that made you hate him. But alas, now you find that you do exactly the same things. This is not uncommon. Evidence shows that most people (esp. sons) who hated and detested what their fathers did (e.g. spouse abuse, alcohol abuse, child abuse, anger, rage, etc), and grew bitter at their father AND swore to do better, end up doing exactly the same things! How can this be? This should really not surprise us, for, after all, you have his blood (or DNA) flowing in your veins.

So? How can one ever escape this?. Never. You never chose your father. You never even chose to be born. And you can not be unborn. What is done is done.

How about rebirth? Yes, that sounds impossible, but familiar. Reborn with a different Father. But this new birth is different, in that you CAN choose who you want to be your Father. But you still won’t be greater than your new Father.


Read Full Post »